why always thinking positively is absurd

Let me just get into the topic. I hate when people say, “be positive”. Is it that hard to just “label” the situation as it is? It is like, “M’am, you will lose one leg, but hey! Better than nothing, right?” Why do people feel the need to be delusional? 

Thinking positively in some situations is the one thing that may hold someone together. We humans feel the need for something that can give us strength in hard conditions, like grief. Of course, you must encourage the person to move on in these situations. But in some cases, it is like chasing a tail. Talking and helping the person figure out is the right thing, not telling lies and trying to make the situation look good. 

There are two types of people in this world: those who put a bandage over their scars and those who pour alcohol on them even though it burns. I prefer to stand that burn because I know it will get better eventually. If I give the necessary care and use proper medication, it will go away. But sometimes, the scar is so nasty that I might have to put a bandage over it, and it is completely fine to do so. In those situations, even for a short period, I feel relieved. Something inside me telling me that everything will be alright is soothing. So, both ways are OK; just make sure not to get caught in the riptide. 

mindset of an optimistic…

So, being positive and realistic is necessary to live. Now, let's talk about what may go through the mind of a person who chooses to be optimistic. First, they think about the happy ending. They imagine how everything will be fine, problems will be solved, and how they will live happily ever after. But then, the storms come. The long-lost emotion of “fear” decides to leave the cave. Even though you choose to be positive, the big bad wolf will find its way to find you. You will start thinking about what could happen if everything goes wrong. And you can not help but wonder, what if things do not work out this time? You think of yourself as a foolish one who believes things would work. If you choose the path with flowers and butterflies, the big bad wolf will find you, and you will have to face it. 

how to balance positivity and negativity 

Now, we have learned that both of these are not the best. They each have their struggles. Of course, each person has their unique way of getting through their situation, but, generally speaking, it is crucial to balance these so that you don’t end up being a fool or draining yourself. Firstly, face the truth. Never run away from your problems, even for a short period. Look at your issue in the eye and say, “I will solve you.” If you decide to run away, you might think that you overcame it, but in reality, the big bad wolf will always be inside you and eating you slowly. Secondly, think of solutions. Of course, this is not an invention, but you must learn to solve it without being optimistic or pessimistic. Be neutral and careful. Have a reality check once in a while to make sure you see every threat. I believe life is like playing chess. When you move your pawn, you must ensure no threat awaits you. You also have to forecast the dangers you might face, like, in two moves, your opponent’s knight may come and defeat you. 

So, now you understand why always being positive is harmful. I do not support the idea that you should never be positive. Positivity is a need for every human, but how to benefit from it is the tricky part. You are the only person to know whether being an optimist or pessimist is suitable for your scar. Every scar will eventually disappear, and finding a cure is hard. Just make sure to listen to your brain and heart…